Risks dating someone hiv positive
Risks dating someone hiv positive - Dominique dejournette dating an sex sites
If you get bareback topped by a guy with an undetectable viral load, and you let him unload in you, that’s pretty safe (in terms of HIV) if you’re on Pr EP and/or you use condoms.But at the same time, I want people to be educated and know what “undetectable” means for each individual. People are basically looking for a checklist: “With a partner who has an undetectable viral load, you can do this and this and this.” Honestly, people are hesitant to give that checklist because of liability.
We now have substantial evidence that people living with HIV who maintain an undetectable viral load to not transmit HIV to sex partners.There are still laws about not disclosing HIV status in upwards of 30 states.So in a “chat” scenario, if you’re talking on a mobile device, like Derek mentioned, I think the immediate go-to is to disclose, or to ask the person you’re interested in sleeping with, “What’s your status? ” Even if it doesn’t lead to something, or even if the person ends up rejecting you, you’re putting the burden of being cool in their court. The first couple of times, it’s probably not going to go well—you’re going to clam up, or you’ll get nervous.All of my serious relationships since I’ve been positive have been with negative guys, and that conversation is central within our understanding of what we can do. But I think it’s important to talk about the act as well, and that undetectable viral load means undetectable in the blood.But I think it’s honestly a very difficult question to answer publicly. There have been studies suggesting that, most of the time, the virus is undetectable in semen if it’s undetectable in blood, but it might not always be consistent.Where is the documentation for undetectable people transmitting HIV?
And then you add an extra layer of protection with condoms, and what are you looking at there? After the age of 22 or so, when I educated myself about HIV and viral load, I never chose partners based on HIV status.Derek brings his perspectives as a San Francisco-based registered nurse specializing in HIV and an outspoken past Pr EP user with HIV-positive and HIV-negative sex partners.In this Q&A, Derek and Zachary offer their takes on what “undetectable” means, and their advice for how to talk about it with hook-ups, dates, and other important people in your life, whatever your HIV status. The first meaning is very clinical: Doctors aren’t able to find a detectable amount of virus when they screen you at regular check-ups. ” Asking the viral load question triggers a series of follow-up questions that help gauge where he’s at and how he takes care of himself.I think it’s gotten easier in the last five years, because more people are talking about being undetectable and what that means for sexual behavior, and also because of the introduction of Pr EP.I know more and more guys under 25 who are on Pr EP and are very comfortable talking about HIV. If you start getting into the real nitty gritty with people who don’t have a work-related or deep relationship to HIV, you lose them. So my advice is, always keep it simple when you talk about “undetectable” and sex.This applies, obviously, to someone who has already been diagnosed as HIV positive, and who has controlled replication of the virus. When I ask guys if they’re undetectable, it’s one question in a series. Today, so much of this is done electronically, on Grindr and Scruff and Jackd and all these applications and online connections, that communication can actually be easier than being face-to-face.